What have we gotten ourselves into?!

I apologize to those of you who are looking to read about our Korean or Kenyan adventures . . . I guess this blog has temporarily turned into a pregnancy blog. Seth and I talked about him writing and possibly keeping up the Korea/Kenya entries, but he said, “I have nothing to say.” :)

Korea in and of itself has been challenging: culture shock, homesickness, etc. Preparing to be parents in Korea has been double challenging. We are facing completely different challenges in our preparations than we would have in the States. Obviously, God has a plan for our lives and He knew what He was doing when he got us pregnant, but sometimes I selfishly and regretfully ignore the significant and clear reasons why I am pregnant in Korea and indulge in self-pity.

I miss being close to my family and Seth’s family, especially at such a pivotal time in our lives. It would be so fun to go maternity and baby shopping with my sisters. It would be so exciting for everyone to get to witness the milestones of the baby’s growth and development in person.

I dream about starting the “nesting” process by preparing an adorable nursery for our little guy or gal adorned with cutesy baby things. I have been trying to let go of that dream since I figure it’s pretty much impossible seeing that we live in Korea, have no home of our own in the States, have no jobs, and have little time to purchase all the equipment necessary.

I continuously long for the delicious American food on my ever growing list! This list may seem bizarre, but some of these cravings are pregnancy cravings and others are just homesick cravings (what a great combination).

I want . . .
a carnitas burrito from Chipolte, avocado, limes, Mom's roast beef dinner, American garlic bread (no honey please), garlic pasta, dill pickle chips, salt and vinegar chips, McDonald's breakfast, orange juice, tuna (I don't usually like tuna), Spaghettios, cranberry juice, cheese balls, Cheetos, a 99cent hard shell taco from Taco Bell, Mom’s chicken and rice casserole, green bean casserole, normal American pizza (no ketchup, seafood, corn, or sweet potatoes thank you very much), potato soup, chili (that’s not sweet), Mom’s cabbage rolls, meatballs and gravy, ham and cheesy potatoes, Big Bowl Asian Kitchen, gravy and biscuits, corndogs (that aren’t sweet), cheese curds, bread sticks, a Panera bread bowl with french onion or chicken wild rice soup, Key’s Café, Olive Garden, sauerkraut, real bratwursts . . . I’m sure I’m forgetting something!

I wish I could have prenatal care in the States because I believe it would be more thorough, informative, and personal. I would have the ability and comfort of talking to my obstetrician or midwife about detailed personal pregnancy issues. I would know where, in what conditions, and with whom I will be delivering the baby. We will have approximately 1 1/2 months when we get back to get acquainted with a doctor/midwife and register for and take birthing classes.

I'm actaully quite nervouse about reverse culture shock. We are so excited and impatient to go home, but I've heard that reverse culture shock is much worse than culture shock.

Lastly, we wouldn’t have to worry about things like flying around the world at 33 weeks pregnant, not having insurance, etc.

That’s a lot of complaining I just did, but those are my feelings and struggles. Now, let me share with you how God is using those feelings and struggles to draw me closer to Him.

Although preparing to be parents in Korea has been double challenging, it has also been a double blessing. We are learning and growing in completely different ways than we would have in the States. God often makes it evident to me why I am pregnant in Korea and not the USA like I would prefer, and I can clearly see the ways in which this Korean pregnancy is glorifying God and helping Seth and I to understand God’s character and provision more.

I am learning to have faith and peace in the fact that God will provide a place for us to live and provisions for our baby no matter what shape or form they take. I am working on knowing that having our own home and nursery for our baby will in no way make his/her life and future better. What matters is not where we live but how we live. What matters is not our home on this earth but our home for eternity. I’m trying to remind myself that this is a temporary stay and that our real home is in Heaven living as heirs to God’s promise. I’m also so grateful that God has given us so much family who love us, want us home, and are eager to share their homes with us.

Like many people, the plan that Seth and I had/have for our future involved success and comfort. God is teaching us how to live for Him without all of the comforts that we desire and without the worldly success we both predicted we’d have before having children.

When I reflect on our trip to Kenya, I’m constantly reminded that so many women (in both the past and present) have had children in conditions much less comfortable then what my own will be.

God has also used our time in Korea to bless us financially. Although we don’t have much money in savings, we will have all of our debt paid off before we leave Korea that includes a car loan and student loans for two people!

We are blessed to have so much supportive family and so many supportive friends. People back home have been supportive in different ways. Some have shown their extreme excitement, others have shown their understanding of the challenges we will face, others have been constantly praying for us.

There are many decision to be made concerning our future after we return from Korea. Our prayer is that we will want what pleases God not what pleases ourselves or others. We pray that God will bring us to the location and situation in which we can best serve Him.

There have been a few changes in my pregnancy since the last entry. I will soon be halfway through my pregnancy! 20 weeks is nearing! I can’t even comprehend where the time has gone. Currently at 19 weeks, I have gained eight pounds and my belly is stretching more and more. It’s pretty obvious to friends, acquaintances, and maybe even strangers that I am pregnant. I can no longer wear my pre-pregnancy pants without a BellaBand. I’ve started having mild leg cramps and dizziness, but overall, I feel super!

We celebrated our four year anniversary last weekend by relaxing in a classy hotel near the beach in Busan. We enjoyed room service, breakfast in bed, sunbathing and reading on the beach, eating western food, and just talking. It was amazing to have no plans and to just do whatever we wanted together.

I was so shocked and excited to feel Baby Schuett moving around during our anniversary trip! I liken the feeling to someone flicking you from the inside. If the kick is strong enough, I can feel it when I rest my hands on my stomach. The baby has a pattern. When I lie down to go to sleep and switch from my side to my back, he usually moves around. We’ve attempted to get the baby to “perform” for Seth, and he thinks he may have felt him, but nothing to definitive yet. I tease Seth that Baby Schuett isn’t to sure of him yet :)

Feeling those gentle kicks for the first time brought on a whole new wave of emotions. The movement affirms that I have a precious life inside me and makes me increasingly excited to meet him/her. However, it also reminds me of the responsibility of having someone completely dependent on me for life.

This weekend my friends from Korea are throwing me a baby shower! I’m excited to just spend time with these ladies celebrating Baby Schuett. I’d like to give a big THANK YOU to Pam for blessing Baby Schuett and me in this way!

Love, Anna-Teacher

Pregnancy is like Puberty

My body went crazy during the first trimester, as expected from word-of-mouth and the three pregnancy books I purchased (What to Expect When You're Expecting, Pregnancy, Childbirth, and the Newborn, and Mayo Clinic Guide to a Healthy Pregnancy). I had a light bulb moment after the purchase that all three books probably say the exact same thing with a slightly different perspective; however, because of the very impersonal, "in and out as quickly as possible" style of medical care that Korea provides, the books have been my constant companions. There are things about going to the obstetrician in Korea that are great. For example, after the Korean War, the government encouraged families to have as many babies as possible, but they quickly had a surplus of people on a peninsula the size of Tennessee, so the government enforced a two child per family rule and then pushed for one child per family. Nowadays, the government is once again encouraging families to have children because of the decrease in population. In fact, each mother receives about $320 as a gift card to use at the obstetrician’s office. This may not sound like that much, but keep in mind that the last three times I have been to the doctor for a check up, including an ultrasound, it has cost approximately $30. There are also some things that are not so great. For example, I have been given little to no advice on how to take care of myself, I have been given very little information on my baby’s health and development, and I have been given no information on potential problems, how to avoid them, and what should be done if I encounter them.

I've heard through my mom and sister-in-law that usually, in the States, a woman doesn't go in for the first doctor's appointment until around 10-12 weeks. I went in at six weeks, had an ultrasound, got to hear that baby’s rapid heartbeat, and take home pictures of little Baby Schuett. After getting the first ultrasound, I understood why people refer to their babies as peanut. Baby Schuett really did look like a peanut, or, as others would say, a manatee or a gummy bear :)

Dealing with the anxiety that accompanies the thoughts of miscarriage is exhausting. I know and love many women who have struggled through the devastation of a miscarriage, and I’m sure that fearing it is nothing close to experiencing it. After going through some worrisome and seemingly abnormal symptoms, I called our Korean friend, Gook Shim, with concern. She only heightened my worry by saying, “Oh, I think it's a problem. You could have gone in to the emergency room!” Fortunately, after a rushed visit to the doctor, we discovered our baby was not only healthy but quite a bit bigger. We got to hear the racing heartbeat for a second time and got to take home another set of pictures. At this stage the bulbous head and minute body were clearly distinguishable :)

The third visit occurred just a week after my emergency check up. We got the results that everything was normal with the tests, and of course, we got to hear the heartbeat again and take home more pictures. Baby Schuett was so cute! His head was huge, and his body had tiny little arm buds. He looked like a little floating alien :)

Being pregnant is like going through puberty. During the first 14 weeks, my body was dealing with sudden, rapid, and unpredictable changes: vicious breakouts, extreme mood swings, sudden weight loss and then sudden weight gain, tenderness, bursts of energy, fatigue, irritability, frequent bathroom trips, neediness, and the list goes on . . .

This may sound strange, but early on I was excited to start “showing.” Despite all of the pregnancy symptoms, it didn't really feel like I was pregnant. I wished there was some way to routinely check up on my baby without having to go to the doctor. It’s a little weird not knowing what’s going on in the oven! I thought “showing” would give me some confirmation that things were progressing.

On April 6^th Seth, Gook Shim, and I went to the obstetrician for my three month check-up. We were so surprised that even though I didn't have a baby bump yet, the doctor did a trans-abdominal ultrasound. To our amazement, Baby Schuett actually looked like a baby, not just a blob :) We could easily distinguish the head, nose, chin, spine, arms, and legs. He/she was also wiggling around so much that it seemed like the ultrasound was tickling him/her. To top it all off, our baby waved at us :) We could even see the heartbeat on the monitor. God is mysterious and creative. Ultrasounds give a beautiful glimpse into the life of an unborn baby. After seeing the miracle of life in the womb, I am struck by the fact that people claim embryos/fetuses are masses of cells, not human beings whose brains are already controlling their heartbeats, who can move, and who can feel pain.

I am currently in the “golden or honeymoon” of my pregnancy. Like the books said, almost as soon as my second trimester started, my body began changing again. Sometimes it's easy to forget that I'm pregnant. All nausea and digestions problems have subsided. The frequent bathroom trips have leveled off. My utter fatigue and exhaustion is gone. I have more consistent energy and sudden adrenaline rushes. I haven't noticed as many extreme mood swings. The reminders that I'm pregnant are my uncomfortably snug pants, increasing appetite, disappearing belly button, growing baby bump, and extra itchy skin.

Last week we returned for my four month check up. Baby Schuett was so much bigger! He/she looked quite crowded in there. I can't even imagine how snug it'll be later on . . . Once again, he was wiggling around during the entire ultrasound. It actually looked like he had the hiccups. He kept bouncing. Although I was tempted to find out Baby Schuett's gender, we told the doctor that we wanted to wait and have it be a surprise, but after leaving the appointment, Seth said, “I think it's a boy.” I still think he/she is a boy too, but you never know! It was amazing to see all the intricate body parts so clearly. The spine, ribs, fingers, toes, etc. are so distinguishable. I just wanted to sit there an keep looking at him :) I also had a QUAD screening done. This screening checks for hormonal imbalances that might indicate a chromosomal problem. Because I took malaria medicine while I was unknowingly pregnant, we were okay with having the screening done. It could help us to prepare for any special circumstances; however, if the screening indicates the possibility of a problem, we are going to leave it at that and do no further testing. God has given us the privilege of being parents, and we are going to embrace that through any circumstances.

In all honesty, I'm still excited to start “showing” more. My ideas may be unrealistic, but I think it's going to be fun to have a big round belly and show it off with cute summer shirts :) I'm 17 weeks pregnant and have gained three pounds. I wonder when I will really start putting on the weight???